XOXO Megan

View Original

The Final Chapter

The Final Chapter: Last Three Weeks of Class at Baylor

Here is something I have learned about myself… I do not like things ending. I am not a fan of change and unpredictability. I don’t want to close the page on an old chapter… I want to keep it propped open so I can still have one hand here and one there. I never want it to be the end of something good because why can’t the good and familiar just continue? It’s the same reason I have watched Gossip Girl continually since I was 13 years old. As soon as I finish season 6 episode 10, I immediately click on the Pilot again and start the series over. I did it today. I have lost track of how many times I have watched that show all the way through because I am just always watching it. Need background noise while I do something else? Turn on Gossip Girl. Need something to watch on the plane? Turn on Gossip Girl. And I have seemingly fixed it. It never ends. Everytime I finish the show, I start it over again so I don’t have to stop the storyline or characters. I never have to say goodbye.

And here I am about to say another goodbye. A goodbye I have not spent a lot of time thinking about. I have been in denial that my college career is ending and I will no longer be a Baylor student. It is different than when I thought about moving away from my childhood house, saying goodbye to my first dog or when I thought about saying goodbye to my family when I moved to college. Those moments had a lot of build up and I wanted to feel all the emotions so that the actual moment wouldn’t be as bad. But this time feels different….

If you know me, you know I am a planner. so I have done what I think will help in a certain situations in order to feel like I was ahead of the curve. Like to prepare for going to college, I drove past my childhood house and listened to “The House that Built Me” by Miranda Lambert. Or, I have always had at least a 2 year plan of what is upcoming in my life. When I finished middle school, I knew I had high school, and then I knew I had college. But, that is not the case this time. This time is just different.

I don’t have a two plan or way to prepare for this next goodbye. I am sitting here writing this post, and before I know it, I will be walking across the stage accepting my diploma. I didn’t think I could love a school as much as I love Baylor. I have met the best people, learned more than I could have imagined both in and outside the classroom, and found a place that has shaped who I am today. And yet, as much as I love this school and don’t want to leave, I am at peace with the end of this chapter. I am saying goodbye to college and my academic career and starting my young adult life. I am graduating college and taking on the world. And as I step into the world, I take a piece of Baylor with me.

Sic ‘Em forever.

xo,

Megan

(P.S. If you are about to graduate, please comment below! I would love to hear how y’all are doing!)